- Being an assistant professor: more trouble than it's worth?
- Rock of Love: What are we supposed to do without it?
- Bret Michaels: Is Manny Ramirez emulating his hairstyle? I believe he is. But WHY?
- Crazy
Sunday, October 14, 2007
HEY LADIES! (Get - Funky)
I suppose gents, too, if there are any out there, but that doesn't really go with the Beastie Boys reference of the title. At any rate, Crazy Medusa's is open for business. It's been a rough day for Crazy (parents, fake boyfriends, and work) and for Medusa (recycled boyfriends, work) and so it seems like a good idea to open up the Lounge. Topics:
- Crazy
- Crazy
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85 comments:
Assistant Professorship: so not worth it. I canceled my class tomorrow as "punishment" for a bunch of students not turning in papers. It's a sick universe when punishment is a break and I need to invent such a punishment to take a mental health day/mini-self-imposed fall break.
Re: Rock of Love. Not clear on concept.
Ditto Bret Michaels.
Perhaps I don't spend enough time on the internet. Ha.
I'm familiar with this variety of "punishment." It's not unlike the "punishment" of being dismissed from class for not doing the reading. But Jesus, how can one teach the people who haven't done the bare minimum required to enable them being taught?
As for RoL and BM (and I feel that the fact that his initials are also the initials for Bowel Movement is a very significant fact) - never fear. It's only a sad group of us who became addicted to that crap :)
Assistant professorship is questionable, but much like a bad book you only realize it when you're far enough along that you may as well finish it just so you can say that you did.
I think I need to repink my hair in honor of Rock of Love. I think I only watched it because I wanted Jes's hair. Brett Michaels is gross and I hate his fake sensitive guy crap. C'mon, it's really all about the sex.
Oh, so not worth it (the assistant professorship thing). Chuck it all and come to law school with me! (assuming I get in, of course.)
Can I say I'm sorry to hear about the potential beginning of Lockdown? And that one of the reasons I'm sorriest is I'd love for you to end up in this part of the world? :-P
Sex? Did somebody mention sex? Can I have some? I think I still remember how... maybe.
AP: only useful as first step out of the abyss. High stakes hell.
Others, I regret w/hanging head, I haven't a clue.
OK. Caught up on the Rock of Love concept and Bret Michaels. Profgrrl should absolutely dedicate new pink hair to show.
Mostly, I wonder how I can get haircut in new "free hour" thanks to canceled class punishment.
I'm being observed this week--in my capstone/genre theory class-- which has somehow made me unable to do any work this weekend at all. I can't possibly read anything for my independent study, I'm being observed! I can't comment on poems this week, I'm being observed. Office hours? I don't think so! Observed. Today was supposed to be dedicated to prepping for said (wednesday) observation class but somewhere into my 4th hour on some blogs I decided I didn't want to sound "rehearsed."
Let's all move to NK's town. There was an article in the paper about how someone moved here from Colorado for a job and, with the economy as it is here, lost his house, his job, his other house and his health.
On the other hand...there's water here.
Brett Michael Michaels, rose with a thorn to me that he is, is a thorough-going narcissist and I truly believe that his sensitive guy act is a parody lost on no one watching the show, least of all my students with whom I talk about the show obsessively. It's not even about the sex, it's about the bottomless pit of need that Bret Michael Michaels represents.
Belle, you so do not want Rock of Love sex. Seriously. An aging former rock star who drinks too much and who must be shared with various other chicks? Nah.
But sex in general is a good thing, I think. (I'm in the countdown til I see 402 again ... 4 more sleeps, and it's already been 3 weeks)
Ah. Bottomless pit of need I'm familiar with.. if you'll accept end-of_sentence prepositions. All too, if you get my meaning.
NIK: doesn't it make you crazy when they observe, and then tell you it shouldn't affect you at all? And that it has no impact on the class? Worse, for me, was when they filmed a class. Thirty people, gone from living, human interacting adults instantly transformed into wood.
Oh, profgrrrl, you are a lady and a fine human being for warning me off. Been there, done that. Without the rock star; just the other bits. Ick.
I shall respond to other commenters momentarily, but first to Medusa,
Much like in Bret Michael Michaels' song "Every Rose Has Its Thorn," Bret Michael Michaels is a thorny, thorny man. Here's the thing: I don't think that he tries to be sensitive. I think for him it's all about ATTENTION, and sex is just one expression of the attention. Other expressions include: helping his other hoes to puke, getting a tattoo of his name on the back of one's neck, and crying and being miserable because he's making out with others are much more important to him. Sex, ultimately, is beside the point for BMM, for if it were the point, he'd have chosen that skank Lacey. Because we all know she blew him.
I think pink hair may be a reality once tenure is granted and cannot be revoked. Or maybe once my dossier gets past the college ;)
We need a reality show about academic bloggers.
Being filmed for observation was worse! My hand gestures! My verbal tics! Must I know these things about myself?
I still only want the Don Draper/Mad Men sex. I'm so unable to stretch beyond type. I'll go look at more VH1 video to see if I can get the sense.
Re: observations -- at least someone cares? (I know, I know, it's a stretch but I had to BEG senior faculty to observe me so I could have the required observation letters for my tenure dossier.)
Profgrrl--we need better visuals for our reality show than reality offers. I sit with my mostly gone glass of red wine and a beige blanket on my lap. And an orange cat who is overly friendly with my leg. Not hot.
Oh, and will there be a Rock of Love #2?
As a person at a teaching institution where observations don't happen, can I just say, I think that observations of teaching are wack and show nothing. How could you possibly NOT be affected (and how could the STUDENTS not be affected?) by the observer?
Belle-- Filming? They film you? I had a photo shoot in my class the other day (only for promo purposes--it's all about the "branding" and corporate model now) and apparently I was the only person not hyper-aware of the incessant flashing and acrobatic maneuvers of the photographers.
Do you have to watch the films? Horrifying! Of what good use to anyone could this be?
I am observed every year. It's a document for the p & t materials, but nothing useful AT ALL beyond that.
nik: You mean you don't want to see my in my blue sweats and orange tank top, sitting on my purple couch with my pink computer (it's a color nightmare, isn't it?), greasy hair, contemplating getting up to grab a maple yogurt from the fridge?
Med, this is because you are comfortable with the papparazzi. Indeed, they are everywhere :)
Well, as an American, I assume I am being filmed at all times. It's just part of my hyper-reality =).
I definitely think you should all move to my town. It's an awesome place and having BLOGGERS here would be even better!
Observations: suck. Being filmed: even worse. Ugh. Ugh. Ugh.
The exams I haven't even looked at: suck. The cover letter I have to finish and mail out sometime tomorrow: ultra suck. Prep for tomorrow's class: way overrated.
(nlLD)H is currently watching Brotherhood, which bugs me because it's a bunch of misogynists - the Sopranos but with Irish guys and less interesting women - but it's set in Providence and it's gray cloudy fall New England ALL THE TIME, and I so miss it.
Profgrrl, I do want to see it, but we need to do something. Some sort of bloggy action. Perhaps laughing out loud? Or saying WTF to the internets? Or finding another glass of wine? Where is the wine?
I add nothing to the reality show. Black yoga pants, blue tee, red sofa, and very shiny skin right now.
Observations: extensive, before my 3rd year review, which has just served to convince me that I suck as a teacher. Bleh.
nik--I have the wine. Pinot noir or merlot?
NK: I could still end up in your neck of the woods - I sent out the initial cover letter and cv before the bullshit of the past week. So who knows?!?!
Are we talking about what we're wearing? I'm wearing a lime green t-shirt and a pair of navy yoga pants with a white stripe down the side. I'm h-o-t-t hotttt!
I need some wine! I put myself on a wine diet because of training. WTF was I thinking?
Are we somehow talking about we're wearing? I have on my new SCORE from the consignment store, Citizens of Humanity skinny jeans. But then there's the white tank and navy hoodie with dirty, dirty wine-stained old Ugg boots. 'kay, so I am the aging Paris Hilton of the group.
Oh, c'mon y'all. You know we are all really ready for the reality show circuit. I'm sitting here in my sequins and spiked heels, eyes fabulously made up... not.
Filmed, yes. Critiqued by a room full of equally discomfited but trapped people, who directed their comments to me. I was horrified, and damned near quit teaching. Then I had to do it for their tapes... ick. Ick. Not for P&T, thankfully. We get to invite our choice into the classroom, and then they fake a fabulous critique for you. Or you for them. Dog & pony only.
You don't suck at a teacher NK, I'm sure you don't. Those observations are wack. Period. (I say this after having not gotten the job at which I did a teaching demo at a slac last spring)
You know what's crazy? That I *know* dudes come by Crazy Medusa's to check out the conversation, and yet they NEVER leave comments. LAMMMMMEEEE. Dude, stop satisfying your voyeuristic fantasies by reading our blog.
Merlot, please. Anybody seen the chocoloate?
I should probably make a collage, no?
Oh, indeed, Medusa, indeed. You know which one I want you to make, even though it would make a lot of people very unhappy (ahem, lamefookers, ahem).
Ooh, I bought two lovely chocolate bars today (dark + orange and ginger chunk -- yummy!). I'll share. Anyone got a G&T for me?
Pouring you a glass of merlot, belle. What's your poison, profgrrrrl.
Ok, Crazy, just for the record, your outfit is sexxxxxxy. Who shall be the star of my collage tonight?
We are *all* superb in front of the classroom. So remind me again why I gave that up for more student-directed classes? Can I just say that I miss lecturing?
Where's that merlot, Dr M?
Oh! I just noticed. I'm wearing my most fabulous shirt. "Stop Bitching and Start a Revolution," it reads. It's green. And imperative.
Dr. Medusa: I would like a blend of the two. I've been making my own blends of wine with leftover bits at the bottom of bottles.
Perhaps that could be the subtext of our reality--varying degrees of wine consumption and less rewarding withdrawals.
All right, getting started on the Collage of Lame Fookers. Carry on the conversation, ladies, and refresh frequently.
Bless you, tarbender... er Medusa. May I call you Medusa, or do you prefer the Dr?
Any others out there who like Dr Who? I swear I was off the planet for waaaaay too long.
Awww, thanks Dr. C.
And the guys should definitely speak up!
Belle: o.m.g. That's just sadistic!
Okay, other than that, I got nothing. My brain is blank at this time of day.
Crazy, I think our outfits may complement each other. Coordinated, like one of those girl bands that wants to look together but not all matchy matchy.
I want chocolate! Why do I have no chocolate??
And I want an imperative t-shirt. I think that's one of the best things I've ever heard.
Can't wait to see the collage. Can we have a collage of Lame-Fooker Employers, too, or is that counter to the spirit of the lounge?
G & T coming right up , P-G :)
Medusa is making the Lamefookers collage. We had a fantasy, once, of a website called lamefookers.com in which we would post pictures and commentaries about lame dudes we've encountered. We've never done such a site, much to our dismay. So the collage will include celebrity look-alikes of Lamefookers we've encountered in our travels. Only those in the know will be able to make the connections, but know that yes, tragically, we've had relationships with each and every one of these Lamefookers.
Perhaps we could all move to NK town and work at Naropa! They might not even have real employers, let alone Lame Fooker Employers.
Well, NK, I have chocolate, but it's the awful kind. On sale, generic or old. Which would you prefer?
I did just get self some wine to go with my whine.
Although all the ex Lame Fooker men may be hiding out at Naropa. I imagine it's some kind of Lame Fooker enclave.
I like how on the comments, when you comment, it automatically refreshes the comment section. However, it leaves me commenting to myself a lot so I can get the new comments fast.
My wine tastes like celery. Perhaps some chocolate would pair well.
Oh, nki, you just prompted a vision... I see a cave, a dark cave with flickering lights from multiple screens. Belching... snorts from the corner... the rattle of empty cans. Surely that's not a plumber's crack shining out?
If I'm getting the lamefooker concept right ... can y'all toss in Giles (of Buffy fame) for me?
nik: Yes! I want to teach Contemplative Psychology. Or perhaps in the Jack Kerouac School of Disembodied Poetics.
I think lamefookers.com would rival Post Secret in popularity.
Speaking of which, my latest guilty pleasure: lolsecretz, lolcats meet PostSecret.
I'm helping Medusa with the Image Capturing - be back in a few
OMG, somebody just grabbed my ankle! Horrors! The lame fookers are alive!
Plato Cave of Fooker. What is this image capturing? Do we get to see the end product here? Must I seek out this Crazy lolsecretz? Do I need another internet problem to go with my wine?
It's coming up momentarily - the Lamefooker Collage. It is a-w-e-s-o-m-e :)
Excuse me while I go for a wardrobe change. Well, and a shower. I stink.
I suspect it is a light blue nightgown that will make up the next costume. I'm craving fleece, but it's still like a gazillion degrees in this part of the world.
Hello people!
(are there still people? This whole West Coast - East Coast rivalry sucks.)
I made it safely out of the cave. Several women raced out after me, babbling of bad dates, plumbers' cracks and beer bellies. We pushed a rock over the opening, but shall ensure that the cave-dwellers have more extension cords; do everything you can to keep them inside. They're not ready for our ... okay, I'm going to say it. Brilliance.
NK: not only was it sadistic, it was unnecessary. Since it was a SoTL (prior to the existance of that) grad seminar, we were all ABD and in there because we were interested in being better teachers. Instead, they filmed us and caused massive anxiety attacks. Sigh.
People are still here, sister. Though I will say this: Biggie Rules!
Hey Sis! Pull up a glass and join the party. Crazy, where's the collage?
It's coming - there were some technical difficulties :)
Hello sisyphus.
We want the left coast.
I just left to go recharge my battery to find that a) I am apparently watching Shark on CBS b) I have no new phone calls and c) I have no emails.
I'm pretty sure my deep desire for internet knowledge has replaced my desire for knowledge of the biblical variety.
Okay, Sis. What're you wearing? We need to coordinate our wonderfulness for Dr Medusa's Lounge Reality show. And we need a title ladies.
I wore the most ridiculous outfit when I was filmed for teaching. Stripes? Possibly woogly stripes?
I burned (ditched at the Goodwill) the shirt and was thereby able to teach again.
I think my email is my Fake Boyfriend--full of general noise with the occasional blip of real important news.
I bled for hours. A fellow ABDer decided radical action was required, and we adjourned for Chinese and DQ Blizzards.
I admit it; I love food.
A title? For our reality show? Well, is it a dating show? If so, I feel the title should be "Hot for Teacher!" The idea is that there would be a single student-type, and he would be choosing amongst us as the teacher whom he is hottest for. The final thing would be something like, "Do I get an A? Can I still be hot for teacher?"
I'm back in a light blue nightgown and lavender fleece robe that I bought in Barcelona in 2001 (which means it is the best. robe. ever.), hair wrapped in a white towel.
Listening to Calexico, Garden Ruin.
By the way, the collage is coming, and it shall be AWESOME (and will tell you far more about Med and I than you ever wanted to know).
First of all, screw caps on wine bottles ARE a wonderful thing, whatever people may tell you about their classiness --- mine is still tasty! (It's a Domaine Alfred red table wine, and no, I'm not wearing it. yet.)
I still have on jeans (which is surprising) and a magenta long-sleeved tee. And bed hair from this morning that I never dealt with. And fuzzy slippers, the sheepskin kind.
I'm hearing you on the email addictions --- I love getting email, but often don't bother to answer it. I just come back five minutes later and whine, "why hasn't anybody emailed me???"
Logical I'm not.
Ooh. That is a good contest. When I was first on RMP, I got my chili pepper and vowed never to check RMP again!
Hot for Teacher? I like it. Only I want to choose between hot students. Of course, that's icky too. Do I want a 20 something?
Oh Crazy, can't we flip that around? Hot students competing for OUR attention?
Damn, I don't want to teach tomorrow.
Belle,
That's exactly what I do. Sometimes, if I haven't gotten any good email in awhile, I'll send out long, panicked emails to my friends. Usually just copy-and-pasted generically from my blog with specific salutations and with questions (to guarantee the returned response).
Email addictions are apparently common. Question for all: how many email accounts do you have?
I'm up to...6.
Hmm.... I would enjoy that flipping, NK. Perhaps it would be a different kind of reality show, wherein there would be a choice of students and teachers? In other words, there would be no one prize at the end?
But Medusa says, "welcome to the reality show that is the collage of Lamefookers." I will say, we both wish that it were not true.
NK: bad weekend? what's the deal with the sudden teaching aversion?
Obviously, everybody's going through the collage. I notice there are no Homer types, so you're still ahead of the game.
I had a blind date with a guy who thought the apex of excitement was bicycle racing. He took me on a picnic and then I was confronted with his lack of a hairline and a big comb-over. His offering: pb&j, apple cider and celery.
Hey, everyone come on over to the collage to continue the discussion! About whatever, oh my god, etc.
Hi everyone. Late to the party, but wearing a t-shirt with a pink jesus on it that says "Jesus Loves Drag." I don't really get it, though. But it's a hand-me-down from Sfrajett, who thinks it's hilarious.
Even better than screw-top wine: wine from a box. From Target. My sister told me it was great and I scoffed. But I looked next time I was there and it was sold out! The pinot grigio is my fav., but since it's kind of autumn, finally, I'm drinking red tonight. Shiraz.
Brett Michaels: I actually kind of bought the sensitive guy thing. My question is, do you think he'll pick up with Heather now that Jes blew him off?
Goodnight, my lovelies! Early day tomorrow! My life is hell, but the time spent Crazy Medusa's certainly alleviates the pain! xoxoxoooo Medusa
Well. As Jess said, he picked the wrong girl. I think Heather is really the one for him. I'll be continuing this convo. up in the collage comment thread :)
I'm interested in the wfab at target. I'm not sure if my target sells any wine....
My parents have drunk wine from a box since I was a child. They were of the hardcore drinking-sixties generation - cocktails before dinner, wine with, and nightcaps after. Hence the box (they went through a lot of stuff, no point in spending a lot of money on it!).
Belle: just burnout. I'm sort of distracted from academia now so am not very into the teaching. I actually like my students and don't really mind being in the classroom, it's just the prep beforehand that's annoying me. And if I'm going to be all academic these days, I'd love actually to DO SOME RESEARCH, which I have not had time to do since about the Ice Age. Right now I have non-academic and academic applications/plans for the future going, and somehow they seem to eat up all my time.
Plus, living with a 9-5 spouse for the first time makes me REALLY want to leave my work at work at the end of the day.
Not that anyone is still left in this comment thread!
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